WEARING MY HEART ON MY SLEEVE
Wearing my heart on my sleeve.
Image courtesy of photo bucket
The punishing Arizona sun has taken its toll and left its mark, and I mean literally, on a lot of carcasses including my own. I’m just one of the major majority that has lived here the better part of our lives and have had to have spots burned, scraped, or cut out of this soul cage to beat the skin cancer clock.
I’ve used that fact to justify wearing long sleeved shirts, sweatshirts ninety percent of the time, even in the dead of summer, to cover up the defeated flesh.
But that’s really a partial truth… The rest of the story is that I’m hiding more than tired skin under those long sleeves.
Like a lot of us I suspect, I’m wearing my heart on my sleeve… just hiding it on the inside down by my left wrist.
We learn early in life that not if, but when, we create something, anything, we open ourselves to be judged and to critics… whether we ask for it or not. A quick jaunt down memory boulevard uncovers art projects in school, a couple of science fairs, and a host of opinions, some pleasant, some not so much.
With enough time and creations, we begin to develop thick skin. The process isn’t so different than some of the other actions that started about the same time as the original critics.
It didn’t take too long playing tetherball or even swinging on the monkey bars to realize that soft skin tears and breaks, but with enough perseverance, calluses come to the rescue… But here’s the thing; calluses aren’t bullet proof.
I was reminded just how exposed our hearts really are, even if we try to hide them on the inside of our sleeves.
I never stopped to consider the consequences of what the critics might say about a manuscript with the memoir of my family between the covers. Just like in grade school the untempered opinions began to unload like bullets from a Glock 9mm pistol.. and the Man of Steel doesn’t happen to be a distant relative.
I respect the folks that create things. It doesn’t matter if it’s building a painting, a home, a church, a reputation, or a book… or even a blog. It takes guts to put your creation out there and let the general public or even friends and family take pot shots at the creations that started in our hearts and souls… It’s not for the faint of heart, regardless of where we wear it.
The desires and gifts to create come from God above when He’s the focus of our intentions. It’s my belief that when we do the best we can do with the proper perspective, He’ll plug the holes in our hearts… and the ones on our sleeves.
When the passion to create and build ignite like a fire in our soul and belly, it doesn’t matter if we wear our hearts under our sleeves, we’re called to roll them up.
The heart, where God resides, can be hurt… but never broken…
Sunday, February 15, 2015 @ 12:30 pm
It is a very vulnerable position when we put something out there, isn’t it? I’m glad you’re braving the critics and writing your story, Floyd. I can’t wait to read it.
Sunday, February 15, 2015 @ 2:15 pm
It is hard being told what you have done is not very good or is not worth their time reading or listening to. They say to keep trying, but the question remains how often do I allow my heart to be smashed? You would at least have one reader Floyd: me. Just let me know.
Sunday, February 15, 2015 @ 5:19 pm
I can’t imagine living with that fire in my soul and not allowing the creation to come to life. That would be painful…more painful that any rejection or criticism. I appreciate your honesty.
Sunday, February 15, 2015 @ 6:38 pm
You are a brave man to send out a manuscript to those who enjoy being a critic. Perhaps I was not so brave to submit mine and chose to self published (at great expense.) Anyway all my family received 3 nice Christmas gifts.
Years ago, I send a poem to a Christian Magazine and they were nice enough to reply; “nice but not excellent.” That was my last effort. Please try a different publisher and get another opinion. I do hope they did NOT simply critique but also made suggestions. I will order your book regardless. Thanks for sharing with us your heart on your sleeve.
Sunday, February 15, 2015 @ 7:08 pm
Hi Floyd,
You’ve changed somethings on your blog, huh? Looks nice.
Did you take some harsh criticisms of your memoir? I’m so sorry. Was that from a publisher or elsewhere? I feel out of the loop a bit here… sorry. Keep writing, keep going!
Jennifer Dougan
http://www.jenniferdougan.com
Sunday, February 15, 2015 @ 8:11 pm
Yep, Floyd, and writers have to have a REALLY tough skin to keep writing and submitting despite what some editors or publishers may say (or fail to say). If God hadn’t called me to write I would have put down my pen long ago. I figure, at best, my average is 4:1–four rejection slips for every acceptance letter. So I am no stranger to what you are going through. My best advice–research the market carefully before submitting. It cuts down dramatically on the rejection slips. Blessings to you!
Sunday, February 15, 2015 @ 8:33 pm
Write because you have something to say to a world whose attention span is shrinking almost by the day, not because they have a nice word to say. Write because it is a gift God has given you, and the proper response is to use the gift in His service. Write – because there is no one like you who thinks like you do, or who has experienced life through your unique lenses, and when you are gone? That gift, and that voice, will not be seen again here.
I know about sensitive, my friend. 🙂
Monday, February 16, 2015 @ 7:06 am
The subject of your writing makes it harder, I think, to stand with the punches. It’s impossible not to take that personally. But it’s also impossible for anyone to take it away from you. They’re your experiences. If God’s calling you to share them, for His glory, then in that respect it doesn’t matter what anyone says. God will lead you down the right path to bring your words to those He wishes to hear them. I hope you can find strength and confidence in that, my friend.
Monday, February 16, 2015 @ 8:13 am
There will always be “haters”.
In fact, having haters is a good gauge that you’re doing God’s will. Yes, there will be haters when you’re outside of God’s will, but there are more when you’re doing God’s work.
Looking at the lives of those in the Bible who were devoted to Christ show that they had many haters, those who opposed them.
We must remember WHO we do it for and WHY we do it.
God bless.
Great point, “The heart, where God resides, can be hurt… but never broken…”
Monday, February 16, 2015 @ 10:57 am
Some of the very best writers have endured some of the worst criticism. I’m glad you’re strong enough to take the bullets, even though they injure. Looking forward to reading your book someday!
Monday, February 16, 2015 @ 12:16 pm
Their loss…praying…
Monday, February 16, 2015 @ 3:06 pm
I try to explain to my hubby the singular journey of writing. It’s a vulnerable journey, for our words are so much more than words – they are a reflection of our hearts. Our deepest feelings, and our most transparent moments. And when they are less than well-received, it hurts to the core.
Floyd, I get it. And I am so sorry that you’ve faced some arrows of criticism. I will be praying for you, because I know that the enemy is going to take this chance to throw a bunch of negative stuff at you, too. Stand strong. Your heart, your words are so enjoyable, and they reach so many. I am convinced that God will open the right door, at the right time – for He is the one who has given you the words.
GOD BLESS, brother – hang in there.
Tuesday, February 17, 2015 @ 6:34 pm
I agree with vulnerable! I think that’s probably the hardest thing about writing for me – putting the writing out there. Especially when I know that some people (people that I love) will condemn me for what I write. It’s definitely a sacrifice.
Tuesday, February 17, 2015 @ 8:36 pm
I had a little trouble thoroughly understanding what you were pointing out to, and I read a number of your commenters. That helped. Obviously, bodies change when we ain’t as young as usual. I can imagine the skin issue you were talking about. I haven’t had that as much…b/c it ain’t as sunny here most of the time… but I DO have insideness. My chest, stomach, and most other places. Have to be careful. IF I completely misunderstood, I’m sorry. I’m loving you whether I’m fully understanding you. That’s true of me and my husband, b/c of me. DUH!! Dementia is gaining more and more of my brain. Love you, Brother, though. Put up with me if you can.
Wednesday, February 18, 2015 @ 8:17 am
You are one inspirational writer, Floyd. You’ll get bored of hearing this eventually but your words often feed me. Creating anything is, in effect, like stripping naked before an audience – like ‘here I am, these words, thoughts, feelings, images, ideas are mine, they reveal the way I am.’ It’s so scary and vulnerable, and so so brave too. I always thought I respected people who create stuff, but since trying to do it myself my respect level has gone up by a multiple of 50. Creativity truly does take courage (thanks for writing stuff like this. I hope and pray you never underestimate how the content and timing of your posts can touch people for the better).
Thursday, February 19, 2015 @ 9:50 am
Your story matters because it matters to the Father… critics may downplay the style but the power of your story matters. Keep pressing on and “Damn the torpedoes!” I’m with ya!
Thursday, February 19, 2015 @ 12:21 pm
Oh, Floyd! I can literally feel your pain. Rejection cuts so deep…because it takes so much courage for us to put ourselves out there like this. To open ourselves and become so transparent and vulnerable. We become “thin” by doing this, and it doesn’t take much to pierce through that flimsy armor. Words! They can do so much good…and so much hurt. Your writing is a GIFT to the world…to all of us. Please don’t let the opinions of the narrow-minded diminish the light you continually shine. I am so grateful to have found your blog, to be able to get your messages in my inbox, to share this blogging journey. I pray God blesses you richly and pours out His love and comfort on you in a thousand ways. Keep pressing on, brother, and know that you have so many in your corner…cheering you on and hoping that only good things come your way. I would buy that book in an instant…and I have a hunch many, many others would, too. Can’t wait for the opportunity. 🙂
Thursday, February 19, 2015 @ 2:10 pm
Man is there is a risk! You risk misunderstanding or ostracizing or judgments that may or may not be accurate. At my heart though, I know I couldn’t NOT do it. I have to create and everything may not be appreciated, but the times when someone is encouraged, blessed, or challenged to live His life–it’s amazing. Thanks for what you do, Floyd! I appreciate it.
Thursday, February 19, 2015 @ 9:10 pm
Floyd,
This: “When the passion to create and build ignite like a fire in our soul and belly, it doesn’t matter if we wear our hearts under our sleeves, we’re called to roll them up.” Thank you for being brave and rolling up your sleeves as God leads you …keep writing as God leads, my friend 🙂
Thursday, February 19, 2015 @ 11:46 pm
“Hurt but never broken” That’s a good way to put it. We’ve had a lot of heart ache here in Ukraine recently but our hearts aren’t broken they still have hope that will outlast this war by a long shot!
Friday, February 20, 2015 @ 10:26 am
Wow….this is such a profound thought, Floyd: The heart, where God resides, can be hurt… but never broken… I’ve never heard it expressed this way! Thank you so much for sharing.
Sunday, February 22, 2015 @ 10:00 am
Floyd, it takes courage to send out a manuscript. I would love to read your memoir! Truly, I would. May you have favor with God and man!
Monday, February 23, 2015 @ 2:12 pm
Hi Floyd,
We are so happy to hear you share your heart with those who care. The others, well, don’t matter. It is life’s experiences that give off an attraction to those who need to relate. God is good and He has received more criticism over His “family story” than we could ever imagine!
Tuesday, February 24, 2015 @ 9:28 am
Floyd, I’ve said here before you have special gift with your words. You write with a unique “lilt” and a “gleam in your eye” that comes through in your words. Your writing style is a pleasure to read.
Tell your story!!!!!
You’ve shared your heart here and in comments round-about blog land and you’ve honored God through it all. I look forward to reading your story. I’ll trust and pray that your manuscript lands before the right pair of eyes. Eyes that will see that your story needs to be shared. God bless …