the test

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I failed again… I’ve done pretty well as of late, but under the right circumstances my flesh takes over. It wasn’t a full blown collapse, just a minor meltdown. Progress I think, in the big picture of life.

I was on an errand to pick up a prescription for my wife who was at home on her back. I was in her car. It’s small, quick, and stops on a dime, not like my truck that rivals a turtle getting up to speed and once there, stops on, not as much of a dime, more like a runway.

As I turned off the main road into the parking lot, I was letting the car feel it’s oats so to speak. I don’t need much of a reason to speed and drive aggressively, seemed like the perfect time for it. About 40 yards off the main road is an intersection inside the parking lot with a 4-way stop.

As I was coming up to the stop sign getting ready to turn right toward the drug store, there was a pick-up truck who had already stopped and was heading west in front of me with the right of way.

The driver of the pickup must have had less confidence in the brakes of my car than I did. As I was coming to a somewhat abrupt stop Mr. Full Beard must have gotten a little scared. He started to brake in the middle of the parking lot intersection thinking I wasn’t going to stop and cut him off.

He started leaning toward me and talking with his hands out to the sides like, “Hey Idiot”! — “You gonna stop or what”! I just looked at him as I finished my stop.

Mr. Full Beard put his right hand back on the steering wheel as he continued to talk waving his left arm around like he’d just witnessed a murder or something. He had me a bit hot under the collar for his lack of self-control in an emotional situation.

I’ve taken pride in my self-control under similar circumstances as of late. I reason to myself and remind my own emotions that weak people have no self-control. I tell myself people like Mr. Full Black Beard are scared. Scared of not being respected. Fear of looking weak in society, but mostly he doesn’t want to look like what he perceives as weak in front of his young son sitting shotgun.

Junior Black Beard looked to be about my youngest daughter’s age. So me, Mr. Self-Control doesn’t respond in anger or any emotion at all. I stop and wait for the scared Tortuga (turtle) to get him and Junior along their way, so I can take my turn.

My wife was in need and I’m in a hurry…

As Black Tortuga Beard gets just in front of me almost across the intersection, Tortuga Junior FLIPS ME THE BIRD!!!!!

Sensory Overload…

I’m talking to myself at this point, “That Little Punk’s Gonna Get His Dad in a Place HE DON’T WANNA BE!!!

The voice from the other shoulder chimes in, “Your wife is at home waiting on you.” — “What are gonna tell her” Then back to the dark side of the force, I mean shoulder, “That’s how you thank me for my kindness and self-control– JERK”!

As the conversation goes on I don’t want to follow Black Tortuga Beard, (his new name finally settled on), but my wife’s car has a mind of its own.

Ding and Dong Junior pulled in front of the fast food Japanese restaurant. So did I…

As I’m getting out of the car, Black Tortuga Beard is pushing Junior hurriedly into the place. Right before Tortuga Beard can enter the store, I’m about 50 feet away. At this point I can’t hear much of anything except my blood pump, I only hear one voice from between and just above my shoulders.

“HAAAAAY”!!!!! I yelled loud enough to wake the dead. Tortuga Beard looked like he was moving faster than he did since he was Junior Tortuga’s age. He wouldn’t look over.

In truth I had no design on violence, I did want to speak and under those circumstances I know that violence is always a possibility.

I turned back toward the car and grabbed for the keys in my front left pocket. As I was lifting the keys out of my pocket, I felt something else come up with them in my hand.

The business cards made for this site came up with the keys. I glanced down at the card. On the bottom right-hand corner of the card, I spotted it. “Finding Floyd.” I thought to myself, “Oh man, I sure did.”

TEST OVER: Results of the test? failed…

If I know God, I know for sure there’s always a retake test in the works…