sleepless night

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The dense midnight fog blacked out the distant city lights. Only the nearby surrounding lights could be seen and their casted light was dim, struggling to push their image through the heavy mist that accompanied the fog.

With doors and windows open, the fog carried its wetness inside and enveloped me in its body. A shiver shrieked up my spine that was shirtless in the midnight hour. A sleepless night… I don’t get too many of those.

I remembered the nights like that as a kid, and even though I never believed in the Boogey man, I knew there was danger.

As I stood gazing into the night that looked like it was straight out of a Sherlock Holmes mystery novel, I remembered my first nightmare. I thought to myself, “funny, of all the things I’ve forgotten, I still remember this”?

Sometimes a night seems to have a life all of its own, a night that lasts longer than the normal six to eight hours. Those nights are given life by our fears. I can’t recall many nights in my life being awakened in the middle of the night due to joy or happiness.┬áThose are the ingredients of a good night’s sleep. The ingredients for a sleepless night are usually quite the opposite.

Similar to that kid being startled from my slumber by a nightmare, now I get shaken from sleep by the hand of reality.

Standing in the damp night air I refused the warmth of a shirt, searching for something in the creeping fog, glancing from light to light hoping to remember or find what it was that beckoned me in the night.

As I looked down to see the moisture inside, I caught it as I was looking back up. It was me…

Most of the valleys that I walked through in my life were the ones I created for myself or due to the course I chose. How many times have we been delivered from the problems we created for ourselves?

How often have we turned everyday difficulties or setbacks into real life nightmares?

Is the dense fog we strain to see through really there? Or is it conjured up in our minds, making it impossible to see the reality and beauty on the other side of that mist?

Yes, there are Boogey men in the world, but the paths we choose are up to us. If the reader is anything like me, I’ve been far more dangerous with my free will than the Boogey man could ever be.

It seems the danger of this world and the things or people in it are temporary. The actions done by us in our heart and body have eternal implications. Jesus Christ had this to say, “Do not fear those who kill the body, but cannot kill the soul; rather fear him who can destroy soul and body in hell.-”

Our fight is on the inside, the results of the decisions are manifested on the outside. Often those decisions come back to haunt us at night. Sometimes, even on a gloomy night filled with fog.

Maybe that is a gift from God? If we can see in great detail with distance, we can forget to look a little closer to home, but the fog ensures it. In this case, home is where the heart is, and in most cases that is the heart of the problem.

The problems we have whether created from without or within can only be repaired from the inside out.

A heart filled with thick fog can be chased away by the Light of the world.

That powerful light of God that illuminates the world is our gift.

And it starts from inside us…